Many would tell you this is an extremely hot topic for me. It most certainly is.
Warning: rough ride ahead. I call 'em as I see 'em.
You see, I was raised witnessing adultery first hand. My dad had numerous affairs while married to & living with my mother, as well as his children (that would be me). I remember well the first time I met my dad's 'mistress'. I was 13 years old. My dad always had boats - my boyfriend & myself went to the lake one day to meet my dad (my mother never went out on the boats) & go out in the boat. As soon as the boat got closer to the dock we were standing on, I spotted her. Her & her two children. In the boat, with my father. I distinctly remember looking at my boyfriend & saying "who in the hell is that?!" I'm sure my dad had many girlfriends before her (or maybe not, not sure) but she is the first one I was aware of. Anyway, my dad pulled up to the dock & we climbed in the boat. Of course I was introduced to his "business associate" & her children. She was a pretty redhead, much more attractive than my mother (truth hurts), she was soft spoken, quiet & friendly. Her children, I believe, were as shocked as I was & didn't speak much. Neither did I.
Francis was in our lives for a couple of years. Or more. Can't remember. Every time my grandparents (my dad's pathetic parents) came into town, believe it or not they would stay at my dad's girlfriend's house, & if we (myself & brothers) wanted to see them, we had to go to her house. I never did. My brothers did. From that moment on - I hated them.
There were times that my mother would leave for work, Francis would come to
our home, cook dinner, clean up the dishes & leave, & then my mother would arrive home from work. Unbelievable. Unbelievable that 1.) she did it & 2.) my father subjected his childen to this kind of trashy behavior. But he did. My girlfriend used to ask me "why don't you tell your mom what your dad is doing?" I'm sure my mother already knew what my dad was doing, but I would look at my friend & say "how do you look at your mother & rip her heart out?" I never said a word to my mom & of course she never said a word either. My dad would disappear for days & then resurface. We all knew where he was. Unfortunately, that was our life.
During this time my dad did everything in his power to get my mom & us to leave. But we had no where to go. I remember bathing with snails/slugs because he wouldn't do anything to the house to help us improve it. I remember our kitchen being completely embossed with cockroaches, our counters were almost black. Filth. Disgust. We lived with it because again, we had no where to go. My dad owned 5 cars & wouldn't let my mom drive any of them. Fortunately at that time my mom's parents stepped in & gave my mom a car. A car with no a/c, because they live up north. So my poor mom drove a car, in Texas, in 105+ summer heat, with no a/c. All the while my dad drove his Cadillac & cute little Mustang, among the others. Within time my mom purchased a mobile home & got us the hell out of there & that mess.
Francis eventually passed away from cancer. I felt bad for her children as they had no one - their dad had passed away years prior in a plane crash. Her kids were adopted, so they didn't really have many relatives. Francis' daughter & I, get this, actually became sisters-in-law down the road, as we married brothers. She then became one of my closest friends & I still love her to this day. I get so excited when I get to see her. We never, not one time, ever spoke of the affair. Never. Our lives had moved on.
Many years later, I meet my husband. Low & behold, his family too was distroyed by adultery. His mother had an affair while married. I remember the first time I met her - we ran to the store for something & she nonchalantly told me about it. She blamed the affair on hubby's dad. Whatever. Or should I say, bullshit. I don't buy crap like that. When you're a grown adult, you are completely responsible for the choices you make. Take responsibility & stop blaming others for your poor choices.
And now we have this. This nasty, disgusting, pathetic, lying sack of crap, known as John Edwards. There is no way, & no reason, to sugarcoat it - he's trash. And he could have been our President, y'all! Sweet. I don't know if you've been keeping up with this scandal & all of this monster's lies, but he's digging himself a bigger hole by the day. And now his mistress' sister is speaking out. He's a frickin' lying jerk. But the worst part about all of this is his wife who is dying, & his children. And of course, his newest baby girl that he is too ashamed & embarrassed to claim. It is absolutely heartbreaking what this family has gone thru & for what is yet to come. Innocent people whose hearts are being ripped out & lives torn apart; & not to mention, all of the humiliation they must endure along the way. I feel so, so incredibly sad for them. They are living a life of hell that no one deserves to live. And his wife is going to pass away under these horrific circumstances! That is just unforgivable. Absolutely unforgivable.
I don't get adultery. I don't understand it. Every home has a door. For crying out loud -
leave! Pack up & leave before you result to killing the last ounce of dignity your spouse will have left. Walk out the frickin' door before you cheat. Why & how do people stay? Do they honestly think that by staying, that will make things all better? How do they climb in bed with their spouse while committing such a despicable act? We all know how many do it. My dad sure did. And his life was pretty darn grand. But the truth is, it wasn't. It just looked like it was - on the outside. I'm pretty sure he was dying on the inside. But he made his choice.
Yes, I certainly could write a book. I've actually thought about it. Ha! But I'm pretty positive my events aren't nearly as interesting as some others'. Admist all the turmoil mentioned above, my brother's new girlfriend had an ex-boyfriend that committed suicide, I dropped out of drill team when I could have went so far, so far as winning a scholarship, my grades went from A's to D's & I barely got my cap & gown (no I didn't get my cap & gown when all my friends did) & graduated, my dad tried to 'catch' me & beat the crap out of me all the while chasing me calling me a slut (I was 12, maybe? Had no clue what the word even meant), my oldest brother entered the Army to escape all the hell we were living, I married & divorced 3 times by the time I was 24, I was abused by my husbands (& my father) not only verbally, but emotionally & physically as well including having a knife held an inch from my face, I've encountered a stalker (still don't really buy that one but everyone keeps telling me), almost kidnapped, blah, blah, blah (meaning a whole lot more). My life was very interesting, yet extremely sad at the same time. And now you know why I'm a little 'different' from some others out there - I typically have a different perspective than others do. I can't & won't apologize for that. It has gotten my where I am today & I couldn't imagine being anywhere else.
And now, thanks to God above, I enjoy & relish in my beautiful bliss. Ü
