End of school & beginning of recital days.

I hate when busyness consumes life! I don't like being rushed, I don't like having (sometimes, multiple) commitments every single day - it sends me into a tailspin & I start to stress. And I certainly don't like that! I enjoy stress-free. I want to keep my glorious, young, wrinkle-free face & skin (ahem) looking it's best. Stress doesn't fit in that equation!

Last year, after our dance year had already begun, Merc's dance teachers suggested we bump her up a class because she dances so well. So we did, which is awesome! But that means she hasn't had as many classes as her classmates have & she's younger than they are. She does a great job with her steps & keeping up, but she has slightly struggled, because she hasn't had the opportunity to practice the routines as much & the dances are just a tad more sophisticated than her age-appropriate class. Yesterday was her first dance performance & I was just a little apprehensive!



This year she dances ballet, tap & jazz. Yesterday's performance was solely tap, so I worked with her on some of her steps. So much fun, since I'm a dancer at heart (I was a drill team girl & loved it!!). I have to say - Mercedes danced the best I've seen all year. I was so proud of her! She truly loves dancing & that just thrills me. I hope she continues to dance throughout her childhood & well into her teen years. And beyond!

I tried to get some photos afterwards, but for whatever reason, she wasn't having it. She was so grumpy! Usually she's my happy, posing dancer, but not yesterday. Maybe she was a little stressed from her first performance, I don't know. So I snapped a few & we went on our way. Her recital is in four weeks & I cannot wait! Merc dances at a very popular, very large studio (433 students this year!) & the recitals are simply amazing! They are very professionally done & the huge auditorium is always packed with family & friends. It is such a beautiful, exciting experience for all the dancers & so much fun! Memories they will treasure forever.



That aside, we have end of the school year. It just wipes me out every year (physically & financially). Bentley had a his first french horn competition, before judges, last weekend (he won the highest metal!) & has another one on Tuesday morning, & then an afternoon at the water park. Friday night he had his first 'spring fling', for kids only. We loaded up he & his friend & dropped them off & they had ball. His activities & schedule are getting busier the older he gets (he's 12 now). He just signed up for a few AP classes next year. We had decided he would attend private school next year & he was totally on board. Until recently, when he decided he does not want to change schools. I couldn't believe it. He loves band so much, he has made so many friends, he just doesn't want to leave. Reluctantly, I agreed he could stay. I want to be sure I always listen & validate my children's feelings, so for now, no private school. Granted, it will save us a ton of money, but I just wanted more for him. Nonetheless, we'll give public middle school a go. I never want him to be unhappy, so I'm sure it will be fine. Even though our district is huge, we are fortunate we haven't had many issues. We are in a great district. His book fair is this week, his field day is quickly approaching, his science fair/experiment is approaching, his '6th grade send off' is approaching, his end of the year concert is approaching - ack! He has band practice starting @ 7:15 a.m. on some days & practice after school on other days. So much all at one time! It almost takes a balancing act to juggle it all.

My two elementary kids had their spring fling last weekend, but we never participate (this year was the first year my oldest has ever attended). I just don't allow those types of things, because in my opinion, the school has my children long enough. When school is not in session, it's our time. But the school still wants money, they still want donations for the auction (in my son's class alone, they auctioned off a TWO HUNDRED dollar basket! I was appalled) & they want baked goods (which comes with restrictions/rules/guidelines) for the cake walk. My daughter had a costume performance a few weeks ago, their field day is tomorrow (for both of them) & now it's teacher appreciation week, so they want money/gifts/food, etc. x 3 teachers. My daughter has a huge project due this week, we still have dance weekly, homework, groceries, cleaning, blah, blah. And my work! My Shaklee has been pushed aside during all this & I hate that! So thankful I have a job that allows me to be home with my kids & work my own hours.

In the meantime, I had my oldest's adoption update that is due. This is our only birthmother that if she had to do it all over again, would not have placed her son for adoption. I love her dearly, & I stress so much over this update. I want it to be everything she is hoping for because I don't ever want her to be disappointed. Thankfully, it's done! I just have to stick it in the mail.

Whew! It's all just so crazy & I'm so ready for summer break! I have many blog posts lined up, so many projects I'm ready to dig in to & decorating to begin! Decorating on a budget, of course! I love cleaning, I love decorating - I'm ready! Cleaning & decorating are stress relievers for me, so I need them in abundance. :)

Moments.

Happy 5th Birthday, Mercedes! My precious, beautiful girl! ♥

Moments.

Tonight. She wanted to sleep in our bed. Which she does sometimes, & my husband carries her to her bed when we go to bed. Tonight, she had her pillow vertical. My husband told her to turn it horizontal. To which she replied "no, I'm going to sleep with it this way. And I'm going to sleep right here in the middle. I promise, I will not move." (Meaning, she won't move around, keeping us awake.) She even moved our pillows off the bed, to put hers perfectly in the middle.

She still sucks her middle fingers.

Be still my heart.

Moments.

♥

Her 1st dance performance.

Was today. Precious. ♥

Kidbits.

As I'm reading books to Mercedes, Yo Gabba Gabba comes on the tv.

Mercedes said: "I can do two things at once: I can listen to you & watch tv!"

Later, in another book, I tell her to "find the chick with wings" & she shouted "IT'S A FAIRY!!!!"

Bahaha! My bad!

I wish I could document her animations & expressions. They are priceless.

Oh how she makes me melt. ♥

Her dream came true.

My girl is a dancer. It comes naturally. And because I adore dancing, I couldn't be happier. ♥



Last Saturday was her first trial class. She dove right in & danced like she's been doing it for years. Not a lick of intimidation. No bashfulness. Just determination & drive.



She got really tickled when it was time for tap dancing. She had no idea that's what came after ballet. Ü After witnessing what I already knew was going to transpire at her first class, hubby & I forked over our life savings & signed this precious girl up. ♥

This Saturday, I'll try to get better photos. There are only 2 tiny windows for parents to peek through, & some motor mouth mom hogged the corner I needed to get good photos of Mercedes. Saturday I'm taking duct tape. ;o)

Lack of blogging is blamed on my husband, who yet again has been in Europe, this time for almost 7 days. I've been a little busy. But what a complete blessed busy it's been. ♥

Happy New Year III & OneWord 2012.

(We went out to dinner & when we returned, all the strawberries had fallen off! :)

1.6.12 - she's 4! ♥

I don't make New Year's Resolutions. To me, they're just silly. I'm sure some remember & actually accomplish their goals, but not me. By Jan. 2nd, I'd already forget what mine was. Ha! But this year, I was introduced to OneWord2012. (Google for more information.) I was intrigued. Very intrigued. Because this works for me. And honestly, I need OneWord.

Almost 11 years ago, I became a mom. And I've mentioned this tons of times - somewhere along the way, I lost myself. Me. Where am I? Yes, I'm a mom. I LOVE being a mom, that's no secret. But what about me? I'm still a person. Or am I? For the most part, I disappeared into an overweight (let me stop right here & encourage you - if you are overweight, that does not mean you can't look good & feel your best - fix yourself up every day!), sweat & t-shirt wearing, hair in ponytail, no makeup mom. But wait just a minute. Can't I be, dare I say, both? Can't we all be both? Like I mentioned prior, I've already implemented changes (I no longer smoke, I wear makeup daily, I exercise, etc. & I'm going to blog all of this as I go). And though I need constant reminding & though this will be a work in progress - damnit - I can be both. I want to be both. I need to be both!

I've really learned to adore & appreciate words. There is power in words (good & bad). There is inspiration in words. Answers lie within words. So, needless to say, for this project, lots of words came to mind. It took me a few days. And then it hit me -

To Thine Own Self Be True.

That's it. True.

Every day, in every situation, I need to stay true to myself. I don't deserve anything less & neither does anyone else. The word true has become beautiful to me. Full of life, if you will. I love it & I'm going to print it, so I see it. I'm going to order a bracelet, so I can wear it. I'm going to do whatever I have to do to remind myself. Because I don't ever again want to forget: me.

Be inspired. Choose a word. And then get busy. Because we don't know how long we have. It's time to live. Now.

When the cat's away...

(Pardon the grainy photo - it's been very gloomy here & I won't use a flash! :)

The mouse will play! She found the Nintendo. And can play the darn tootin' thing(s). We typically do not allow Nintendos before age 7. This year, that changes. Guess what she'll (& her big sister) be getting for her birthday? Ü

About the couch. Ugh. I love this couch. We've had it many years & it is probably the most comfortable couch we've ever owned. But, I do believe it's run its course. It's really starting to bug me. Next year, I think I'll put it on the list to replace. And I'm anxious to get paint on these walls - I'll just have to force myself to choose a color! ;o)

Our Christmas shopping, minus odds & ends, will be complete - tomorrow! Woot! My husband took today off & he alone knocked out a lot of shopping. I will finish up 1st thing tomorrow morning. (Wasn't it just Monday I was panicking that we might not make it in time? No need to panic!) We've never been done this early & we've never wrapped in advance. Ever. I'm so excited that this year we'll have wrapped packages under our tree! In the past, we never really wrapped in advance & placed them under the tree because we had a baby. No more babies. Sniff. All I know is that next week will be completely stress-free & we can bake, play games, wrap, people watch at stores (heehee), look at Christmas lights, the whole nine yards. It's the simple things, always, that really excite me.

Happy weekend! Make it fantabulous!

The 'you're boring me' look.

This is just a snapshot I took on one of our gloomy days. ☺

I blew it way out so you could see her hair. Her spirals are really starting to form! So cute.

She looks like such a kid here - the baby in her is fading fast. Sigh. 21 months here. She is so precious & she still has the most perfect lips! :)

Mercedes' photo shoot 9.27.09.

20 1/2 months & growing way too fast. ♥

(The one below is the same as the one above - hubby wanted to see it in color, even though there is a little leaf on her eyelash.)

Sisters.

What a sweet kiss. ☺ As you can see, Jaguar is clearly kissing Mercedes. Mercedes, however, is not kissing Jaguar. As she is grabbing Jaguar's hand, she is thinking "get your arm off me sister, or you're going down!" And yes, Mercedes can take her sister 'down' in 2 seconds flat. The good news is, Jaguar always comes back up giggling. Love these girls! :)

Quality test.

Ah. So not happy with these. Will try one more time after charging my battery.

Manual - not a snapshot.

Romaine eater.

She's also a ham. ☺

LOVE this baby! Even with her whacked out hair. :)

Almost 18 months.

Isn't she cute? Yes, she is. And she's a bully! ☺

(Here she's modeling my new cowboy hat. I have yet to figure out why in the world I bought that dumb thing. :) She still has the most amazing lips!)



This toddler is intimidated by no one. Doesn't matter what size you happen to be. She's a smacker. She's a thrower. And she's a pusher. If you are holding her, & you make her angry, she's gonna pop you right in the face. If she's holding something, & you make her angry, you better duck 'cause she's gonna chunk that object straight at your head. (Just ask Audi. She's infatuated with that child & banging on his head. The boy doesn't stand a chance around here. He's very experienced with the 'stop, drop & roll' method.) And if you're somewhere she wants to be - no worries - she's going to physically remove you by pushing you out of the way, so she can be where you are were. What baffles me the most is that none of the forementioned behavior is allowed in or out of our home. Her siblings do not hit/smack. They do not throw (unless it is acceptable throwing with an acceptable object). They do not push. She has not been in a church nursery enough to learn this behavior from other undisciplined children. So, I have no clue how this came to be. I do know it is not tolerated & she is reprimanded sternly. And I do know that she continues to ask for forgiveness by tossing her arms around you for a hug & kissing you smack on the lips. Then all is well until she does it again. ;o)

The below photos show how she runs around every.single.day. Something of some sort is constantly hanging out of her mouth. It's the strangest thing. I remember when Audi was little, he always had to have something in his hand (actually, he still does). She, however, must have something in her mouth. It bothers me for safety reasons, but there is nothing I can do about it. I can take objects away & in no time she'll have something else in there. So I've decided to pick my battles & just let her be. This object happens to be a utensil from a tea party set. ☺



Is she not the cutest thing? Pony tail 1/2 in & 1/2 out & those dimples - so sweet. Her hair is still very unruly. And getting worse. It needs to be trimmed but there is no way she will sit in a beautician's chair while her hair is trimmed. I'm contemplating doing it myself. Because her hair is curly, the beautician told me I really can't "mess it up". Obviously she didn't know who she was talking to. ;o)



The photo below is one I snapped tonight. She's a dipping fanatic. She wants everything dipped if mom's dipping. Hot sauce. Ranch dressing. Ketchup. The only thing I can find so far that she is not interested in is sour cream. The child eats salad. She would live off of strawberries if I let her. She eats veggies (prefers raw) except for green beans. She won't touch them. She devours salami. And french fries. Tonight I put her own ranch on her high chair tray & she went to dipping her carrots & green bell pepper all on her own (usually I do it for her). She's getting to be so big. Her hair is wet here - I had just given her a bath. Who in their right mind gives a child a bath, lotions her up & then gives her ranch dressing all to herself? She had fingerpainted quite a bit when she was done dipping. That's a scratch on her forehead. The other day she was trying to stand on the underneath shelf of my server, when she stood up & whacked her head. That's her 2nd forehead scratch. The first one (you can faintly see the white scar in the above photos) I think she did with her fingernail. It's tough being little!



It's crazy how much I adore this baby. She is so darn tootin' cute, I just can't get enough of her. Probably because there is strong possibility she is my last. Sigh. I think I'm trying to soak in every thing I can before this stage is gone forever.

----------------------------------------

Saturday is our annual 4th of July family reunion. This is always such a busy week, trying to line up clothes for everyone, food to cook/bake, snacks/drinks for all my miniatures, all necessities for the long (rarely are we home before midnight) day, etc. Well low & behold, hubby is headed to NY! Are you kidding me?! That means two days less for my obsessive compulsive behavior! ☺ He heads out tomorrow night, so graciously he is working from home tomorrow so I can run errands. Now one day less for my OCD. Thursday not much will be accomplished since he won't be home until midnight. That will leave us Friday, dead tired because I always wait up for him, to wrap up loose ends before scrambling around like chickens with our heads cutoff for Saturday's early departure. Wow. That was a long sentence. Did you get that?

Off to watch Tori & Dean! I think buying both of Tori's book are in store. :)



(Photos are snapshots! Except for the 1st one. :)

Something was missing.

When I woke her from her nap.

Sigh.

☺



(snapshot.)

All is forgiven.

She told me she was sorry, the only way she knew how.

Last night, she proceeded to pick up a plate of warm veggies & she ever so graciously dumped them all over my floor.



She got a very stern scolding from a very frustrated mommy.

She puckered those oh so gorgeous lips & began the pout. Then she reached both arms out to me. I hugged her. And then - she kissed me. I told her it was ok.

Then she reached out to me again. I hugged her again, & told her it was ok. Then she kissed me. Again.



And then I just about melted.

I told her I forgive her.

Be still my beating heart. ♥

Sometimes I'm a slow learner.

For months now, Mercedes has enjoyed throwing all her food off her highchair tray. And that's after she eats what she wants, & then squishes & crushes the rest. She throws her sippy cup down at least 12 times every meal. Snacks included. She is nasty! She has ruined most of her clothes & I often contemplated making her eat naked. None of my other babies were ever this gross.

As of the last 2 weeks, she can now completely remove her highchair tray. Man is she gifted. So everything goes piling down again, this time though, tray included. The most annoying noise. Food & milk & juice flying everywhere. I can no longer keep my floor clean. I can no longer keep her clean. I can no longer keep my sanity.

Today at lunch, I removed the tray & scooted her up to the table. I gave her cheese cubes, mandarin oranges & milk while I fixed the raviolies. Before long, I saw her giggle every time she tossed down a piece of cheese. Then I watched as she squeezed the juice out of all her mandrin oranges & began throwing them. All over the table & floor. Her clothes were covered in orange juice & everything was an icky mess. My Mercedes got one stern scolding!

But I finally wisened up. I took all food away. I took her milk cup away. I cleaned her & Clorox wiped her highchair & surroundings. From here on out, she will get no food until I feed her myself piece by piece. This routine may take longer - but probably not, considering all the cleaning I was having to do @ each & every meal.

When she had finished her lunch, there was no mess. Voila! Such a shame I didn't catch on 2 months ago. Sigh.

****************************************

Mercedes is really starting to slim down. I can tell a difference when I hold her. I've noticed she isn't eating as much as she used to. She's slimmer now. ☺

She can say "bye-bye", "nigh nigh" & waves when she says both. When the music comes on, she is dancing like nobody's business. She throws everything she gets her hands on. She was headed for Audi & as soon as he spotted her, he ran for cover right as she threw a toy at his head. I cracked up as I congratulated his quick thinking. We all know to look out when she comes running with a toy. Chances are, one of us is in the line of fire.

She sure is cute. But now she's cute & clean! ☺

Dear Mr. Inventor.

Thank you. ☺